Sneaky people

I don't do sneaky. Not the kind that takes place at Christmas or for birthdays where the act of sneaking is to put a smile of pleasure on the recipients face. I am talking about the kind that takes place behind a person's back that is not done for the purpose of making a person smile. I have a new job and it is an okay job. Other than the fact that there are only 4 women (including myself I might add) in this office and out of this 4, two are very moody, the job has been going okay. Until today. Today I was brought two tickets that I had made keying errors on. Two tickets out of the probably 25 to 30 that I turned in. They were not huge errors and I appreciated being shown them as a reminder to myself that I need to slow down and watch my key strokes. What irritates me, no what pisses me off, is the fact that these two errors were given to my "supervisor" (who happens to be much younger than me) so she could point them out to me. And not just that, the errors were circled with black ink with WRONG written under it like I had just broke one of the Ten Commandments. There are only 4 of us for crying out loud in this office! And I have only been there for a 4 days! 4 FREAKIN DAYS!!! Surely, a few errors can be excused and brought to my personal attention, instead of being given to a supervisor like this has been an on going issue that I have been spoken to about and have failed to correct. Sneaky. Said person should have brought it over to me and let me know that this was an error on the tickets. I am still pissed. Am I wrong to feel this way? I am an adult. An adult I might add who worked for 9 years in the office of a multi-million dollar manufacturing company and for 2 of those years I was a supervisor. I am NOT a twenty something with no office experience. I resent being treated as such and I plan on speaking to my "supervisor" about it tomorrow. I probably need to calm down first or I will be fired.

New Job

My, has it really been 4 days since I posted last? Doesn't seem like I was that busy but I really haven't sat down at the computor for any length of time! Well, I have started my new job and after yesterday, I wasn't so sure that I was going to like it. I was bored! But today, I was given more to do and the day went by much faster. But I am exhausted! I am not use to getting up at 6:00 every morning, working all day and then coming home to cook supper, do the dishes, pick up the kitchen and the house and get the kids bathed and ready for bed! Come 8:00 I am exhausted! I know that it will become routine for all of us but in the meantime it kind of sucks! It has been over a year since I have worked full time and I am out of practice. And the kids started school yesterday as well so they are still a little out of sorts. And grouchy!! Lord a be they are grouchy!! I love it when bedtime rolls around!
Now, I do have back to school pictures to share but of course have not downloaded them from the camera. It's that routine thing again I tell ya! Mine is out of whack!
And tomorrow is my birthday and I know that my husband has not bought me a present let alone a card from either him or the kids. I am trying to not let it bother me but deep down it does. If it was important, he would find the time to pick something up or have someone (his MOTHER) do it for him. I would do it for him.

Signs of Fall

One of my favorite movies of all time is You've Got Mail. I so love that movie. I'm not sure what it is about the movie that draws me. But at the beginning of the movie, Meg Ryan's character comments on how she loves fall and the smell of freshly sharpened pencils. Or something like that. Kids returning to school is a sure sign that fall is around the corner. My kids start school on Monday and tonight was Meet the Teacher night. Seeing all of those kids lugging in their backpacks full of school supplies, and their parents carrying the excess, reminded me of that particular moment in the movie.

The kids are so excited to start school again to see their friends and parents are excited to send their kids back to school. I too use to love going back to school for the same reasons. But I also liked going back to school, because for me it was the start of fall, my favorite season. I grew up in New England and there is no better place to be than New England in the fall. Living in Texas, we do not really have a fall. Oh, it cools off a little but it is not the same. There isn't that crisp smell in the air or the crunching of leaves under your feet when you walk. There are no vibrant reds, yellows and oranges along the roads. I miss the start of hunting season and the signs advertising a Hunter's Breakfast at the local high schools or local churches. I miss seeing all of the hunters decked out in hunter orange. I miss seeing kids jumping in the piles of leaves and messing up their parents hard work. I miss the faint smell of wood smoke in the air. I miss....all of it.

I'm glad for the start of a new chapter in my kids lives but it is also bittersweet. It makes me very homesick. I start thinking of all of the other things I miss (like the first snow or the crunch of snow under my feet) and I question if living here is the right choice. My entire family is in New England and they are missing out on such an important part of my kids lives. Don't get me wrong, I do not walk around in a depressed state! I am actually very upbeat and love living here! But this time of year is the hardest for me. I have made a good life here, but where I grew up will always be where my heart is.

The Job

Well, I got a new job. Now I just have to go up and let them know at The Job that I can not work for them for $50 a day. And I am scared to death. I put on a good front that I don't care what people think, that if they don't like it, tough. And for the most part that is true. But deep down I am a pleaser and I don't like it when people are unhappy with me. I would really like to just call and let them know, because I am a wimp and all, but I know that is not the right thing to do. That the "responsible" and "adult" thing to do is go up and speak to them in person. But it really sucks to be a responsible adult.

Conversation with a 7 year old

As my son and I are driving to see a friend of mine this morning, this was a question put forth by my son...

"Momma, do you have chest hair?"

My mind was saying "What the hell!", but my voice said "No son, why?"

"Just wondering."

This is the same child who asked me, once again while driving along in the car, how God made the holes in our butt. Yeah. Didn't have an answer for that one.

The art of Pictures

I really need to put a picture of myself on my blog. But I do not have any pictures of just me! I am always on the other side of the camera so in order to have a picture of me, I am going to have to have one of my offspring take a picture. Great fun. Plus, I really don't like to have my picture taken. My face is always to shiny, my smile showing just a little too much gums. Why oh why couldn't I be one of those folks who do not know what it is like to take a bad picture? My daughter is one of them. She is a natural in front of the camera. Quick to pose, quick to smile. Maybe it is because she was the first born and we always had a camera stuck in her face. This is her.

This is her dance picture from this year. She is holding the pose perfectly. But what you can't know is that the entire time she is telling me through gritted teeth "Hurry up mama." But she never loses her pose. Talented kid.

Then there is my son. Sometimes he likes to have his picture taken.

Smiling for the camera (sort of) and waiting for mommy to take the picture. Probably because he was getting what he wanted and was in a good mood.

And then there is the task of taking a picture of them together....ah the love.

The request was simple....put your arm around your brother so we can take a picture. Yeah, didn't go over well. You would think they didn't share the same germs or something. The sad thing is this is not the only picture like this. We have several. Some day, some day, she WILL like her little brother.

(P.S. I apologize for the quality of the pictures. I do not have a fancy program to enhance the quality of my photos. But I am working on it! wink Although, I'm not sure there is a program in the world that can correct the errors of the photographer.)

Nothing to say

I got nothing to say today. Which for those who know me, would find that hard to believe. But it is true. I have a lot going through my mind and am not sure how to work it all out. Even trying to put it into words is difficult for me. It all boils down to me trying to find a job and the current "job" situation I am finding myself in. While The Job itself is great, the money is not. It downright sucks. And as much as I would like to keep The Job, I need to do what is best for my family financially and that ain't it! The problem is that those who recommended me for The Job probably wouldn't see me leaving The Job as the right decision (as they would take it personally) and have the ability to make my life in this small town, and my husbands who works for the same organization, hell. Since my husband has plans to stay there for years to come, I really do not want to put him in this position. Of course, him being of the male species, just says F*** them, do what you have to do. But me being of the female species wants to make everyone happy and not have people mad at me. Just writing all this makes my head itch.



I realize that on the grand scheme of things, this is so minor. I will at least have an income starting in a week, as meager as it may be, and I was up front when I went it to discuss the job, that yes, I was interested but since the pay was so little, I would have to keep my applications out there in the hope that another job would open up. And since The Job is only temporary as the full time person may still come back, can they really expect me to do anything different? I mean seriously. We want to buy some land and finish fixing up our house and none of that is possible with the income The Job is offering.

Life decisions suck.

(And I guess I had more to say than I thought I did!)

Friends make the world rock

I love my friends. Some of them more than others of course, but as a general rule, girlfriends are the best! We always talk about having a "girls night out" but between games and practices and husbands, it never seems to come to fruition. But last night it did and it rocked! (Although some feel the need to continue to be the center of attention IN THE MOVIE THEATER DURING THE MOVIE but that is for another post.) A group of us went to a local mexican restaurant for supper and adult bevarages and then we went and saw Mama Mia, which if you have not seen it and you are female, GO. SEE. IT. NOW. I have seen it twice and liked it even more the second time around. And the music...oh the music! How I love the music. It makes my feet tap and my butt dance! And to the horror of my two off spring, it makes fantastic car dancing music!!

The friendship of both the younger and older generations in the movie, are friendships that I want to have. The friends who you can pick up with where you left off even if it was 3 months or 3 years ago! The friends who know all of your dirty secrets and still love you anyway? Yeah, those kinds of friends. And you know what? I do have those friends! But the sucky part is they all live a zillion states away and I can only stay in contact with them via email and the occasional visit when I am able to make it back to my home state. I miss them everyday. They knew the awkward, stringy haired girl of my youth and the rebel, party girl of my college years. They were there through the mood swings and the boyfriends and the tears and they still like me! How I wish they were here for my adult years too. But when I do see them...watch out!! We pick up where we left off and sometimes forget that we are now wives and mothers and probably shouldn't be acting the way we do!

I am fortunate though that I have made friends in my adopted state who are becoming those friends of my youth. Most of us have been friends going on 6 years and they have made my life in a new state much easier. We now have a history together and that feels great!

So grab your friends and go see this movie! I will warn you that there are a few parts that are a little, aah, corny for the lack of a better word. But it is still so worth it! I mean, it's a musical and Pierce Brosnan is singing so what do you expect?

It's official

Well, it's official. I am no longer a virgin. A blogger virgin that is! This is my first ever post on my very own blog! I, of course have no idea what I am doing or what all the technical mamba jambo stuff means but I am guessing I will figure it out through trial and error. Which probably isn't a good thing.... I hope I don't break any laws or rules along the way! That would be bad.

I haven't even told my friends or family that I decided to start writing my own blog. I'm not sure why. Maybe because this is the only thing that is all mine. Something I do not have to share with my hubs or my kids. Unlike the bathroom where I can NEVER seem to get any peace and quiet. Why is it that when the door is shut (and locked mind you) the family feels it is an open invitation to knock on the door and ask "What are you doing?" What do they think I am doing? My nails. Well, I have done that before but I mean seriously.

Anyhoo, as I was saying. This is something that belongs to me. Something personal. I don't believe anyone will ever read it and that is ok because this is more for my sanity than for anyone's pleasure. All opinions are mine. All mis-spelled words (and there will probably be a lot) are of my own doing. This is a place to record all of the crazy, sweet, stupid things my kids do so that I will remember them and be able to use them against them at certain specific times in their lives. (Like when the daughter is finally allowed to date and she chooses some loser we don't approve of. Oh yeah, out come the naked pictures and the stories. It's my job.)

We have had alot of, lets say stress, over the last few months and I have sometimes forgotten what good there is out there and what beauty. I really need to take the time to look around and appreciate how fortunate and blessed my life is. I need to hug my kids everyday. I need to stay connected with my friends as friends are as important as family. My hope is that by putting things on paper (or web as it may be) I will be reminded of all of those things.